It’s with a very heavy heart that I write this update. On Friday, May 22nd, around 1 PM, our beloved Kramer’s spirit was released. In a ceremony honoring his wishes communicated to us through an animal intuitive, we surrounded him in love and beauty. It was a gorgeous, sunny day – Kramer’s favorite for being outside together. We arranged the chairs on the deck in the way he wished, placed a beautiful rose bush my parents gave me near us, and had soft, guitar music playing.
Kramer loved to bask in the sun. Here, he's stopping to smell the... well... plant.
After the veterinarian arrived to administer the humane euthanasia, Missy and I took a couple extra minutes with Kramer, holding him and telling him how much we love him, and how free his spirit was going to fly now without the weight of his ill physical body. The vet then joined us and I sat in the chair he wanted me in, with his favorite blanket on my lap, and placed him on it. Missy knelt down next to him to be close to his sweet face (again, his wishes), and placed her hand on his side, petting him. I placed my hand on hers and closed my eyes, sending Kramer messages in my mind, “Be free now, baby. Fly free.” Repeating this over and over like a mantra, I hoped to calm my energy for him and to help him transition with light and love.
The process began, and less than a minute later, I felt Kramer’s body ever-so-gently get heavy on my lap and in our hands. He slowly moved from a seated position to laying, and a huge wave of peace came over me. The gentle and loving veterinarian and her technician stepped inside to give us time with our boy. We each kissed his head and thanked him for all the gifts he has given us. Finally, I looked up and said, “Don’t forget to stay in touch.”
For most of the afternoon, the overriding feeling we both were experiencing was peace, which was so incredible. We were so thankful that we listened to his requests and created such a beautiful setting in which he could transition. As nighttime came, sadness overtook, as I guess we should have expected. We know that sadness will be with us for quite some time, but it doesn’t take away from the relief we feel that he is now free. We just need to allow ourselves to grieve as often and as long as necessary.
Having made the appointment in advance due to how weakened he had become, the three of us spent extra quality together time in the back yard the night before. Kramer decided to venture into the neighbor’s yard, and, for the first time, stepped up into their beautiful labyrinth. How incredibly fitting. We know he wanted to let us know he was ready for his peaceful journey. He’s a pretty amazing cat. Here he is the night before:
Because he had been sick for a while, we knew this day was coming. While it doesn’t make it any easier, we are so incredibly grateful for the gift of being able to consciously walk with him to the end of his physical life and do all those things together that most people wish they could have done when a death is sudden. We love and miss our handsome man so, so much. Thanks to all the people in our lives who knew him, loved him and played a part in his almost 15-year journey.
It’s my intention to finish the Kramer Chronicles, but I make no promises as to when the next installment will come. I feel like it could be very soon or it could be a while. I’m just going to honor where I’m at each day.